Wednesday, February 01, 2006
It's a wonder how something as small and unimportant like the o levels results can get me so stressed out like that. ok who am i kidding, it is not small neither is it unimportant. and maybe that's why im so tremendously worried and yes not to mention panicky. ever since sec three, it has been a pain to look at any academic results i'd get back. somehow they just weren't up to anybody's standards. it's always been that bummed feeling and i'm just wondering if it be that same old familiar feeling with the o's. touch wood. i hope not and im praying i'd get to feel that different feeling for once in my two years of upper sec life. you see i made a horrible choice by taking 3 pure sciences and then struggling with all. im just not a science person as any of you who knows me would know. therefore it results in me getting a grade that leaves me wondering if i should just quit school altogether. haha. ok im kidding but ya results have been really depressing so far and unfortunately in singapore, all people even care about is the results. RESULTS! occasionally you get some bullshit from whoever that results are not everything and its the character blah blah, but at the end of the day does your character get you in to a good college? no its the RESULTS that matter. anyway the next time i blog, it'd either be i screwed up o's or i did ok. not gonna think bout doin exceptionally well. sigh..it's not that i have no faith in myself, it's just that i've had too many setbacks academically wise. hee..
anyway trip to thailand was quite good.it almost felt like the old old brenda when i kinda had a tiny crush on this thai guy at the hotel. oh man he's reallly handsome and charming, not to mention speaks good english and so gentlemanly. bout early 20s i guess. haha. it's been a long time since i felt that way with everything happening in singapore. i just cant afford to have any crushes you see. actually well, not crushes but admiration rather.haha.and in singapore, i had another admiration for edmond's fren! haha. ok im not really being serious here, but well that guy sure has charisma, at least to me. we were paying blackjack and the banker had 27, he had 25 or sth, he was like, oh so i still win rite? hahahhaa!! how cute is that. ok i should stop it. again im not being serious. haha. but i sure do miss those days where all i had were crushes and no major major commitments or whatsoever. heh.
ok i shan't go there or huang and angie's prob gonna be shaking their head. sigh.haha.
i still cant believe the results might be on my birthday. 7 FEB!! people 7 FEB!! hahah. sigh..saddening. i really dun like it here one bit. really hope i'd be able to fly away to study. oh man. someone bring me away!
Posted by Brendy at 10:55 AM